How to Be Emotionally and Socially Intelligent Adults

This matters for so many reasons. For the purposes of this blog, it matters deeply because:

When we model being socially and emotionally intelligent adults, there are many benefits for our students/children, including but not limited to:

  • improved conflict resolution

  • improved stress management

  • improved communication

  • elevated empathy

  • improved performance in any area

Here are the essential pillars to being an adult who is more socially and emotionally intelligent. I encourage you to treat this like a guide, and not like a list of “things to do.” Read over this, post it somewhere, and be intentional as to how you can take these concepts and make them part of your daily routines.


In a nutshell, here are the essential components of this concept:

  • Affirm others often and authentically

  • Trust yourself

  • Pay attention to the energy of others and choose who to connect with wisely

  • Risk with your ideas

  • Live with a sense of daily wonder


Below are the foundational pieces which make up this concept:

  • Serve others without expecting to be served

  • Learn to love yourself

  • Embrace your imperfections as opportunities to reimagine your best self

  • Learn to use all of the love languages

  • Experience the many forms of love; then reflect (repeat… in that order)


The following are the most relevant pieces of this puzzle related to this concept:

  • See adversity as an opportunity for growth

  • Embrace errors as one more step in your growth continuum

  • Ask “Why?” more often than you do “What”?

  • Ask “How?” more often that you do “Where”?

  • Ask questions more often than you make statements

I would love to hear how this is impacting your daily life and the quality of your relationships with your students, your children and your colleagues. Tag me on twitter @EnriqueHank and use #IgniteCuriosity in the message.